Why Wait for a Seat? Let’s Build Our Own Damn Tables

Guest post by policy expert Lisel Petis

Why aren’t there more women in elected office? It’s not because we don’t want to be there—it’s because we’re often told, outright or subtly, that we don’t belong.

A while back, I was chatting with a male friend about how disappointing it is that so few women hold elected positions, especially in this day and age. His response? “Well, maybe it’s because women just don’t want to run.” That comment hit me hard. As a former city council member in Colorado, I know firsthand the challenges women face when stepping into the political arena. I’ve helped other women run for office too, and trust me—there’s no shortage of willpower. 

What we do face is a constant barrage of, “Can a woman really win that seat?” as if our gender somehow disqualifies us from leadership, or at least because voters fear society isn’t ready, leading them to hesitate and perpetuate the very barriers we’re trying to break.

If a lack of a will to run were true, how do we explain states like Colorado, which in 2022 became the second state to hold a female majority in their state legislature? Yet, even with progress, they have still failed to elect a female governor or U.S. senator because of fears of, “will other politicians take them seriously?” The fact that we still ask these questions, even in states more advanced than others, shows that this isn’t a matter of desire—it’s about deeply ingrained systemic barriers.

In the South, generations of women have faced deeply ingrained barriers to political office. From the beginning, political systems were designed to keep power in the hands of men. Even after the hard-won battle for women’s suffrage in 1920, discriminatory practices like poll taxes and literacy tests continued to block women, especially women of color, from full participation in democracy. Fast forward to today, and those barriers persist in new forms. These entrenched obstacles remind us that breaking through isn’t just about individual will—it’s about dismantling systems that have kept women from leading for far too long.

A recent article in the Greenville News highlighted how abysmally low female representation is in South Carolina’s elected offices. Women hold only 27 of the 170 seats in the state legislature.Only three states have a worse representation: Mississippi, Tennessee, and West Virginia.  These numbers are a glaring reminder of just how far our state has to go. Seeing the progress in places like Colorado only amplifies how much work remains for South Carolina.

When women aren’t included in positions of power, our voices and needs are often drowned out. And while there are men who champion women’s rights, they simply can’t bring the same lived experience to the table. Issues like autonomy over our bodies, access to childcare, workplace equity, and even affordable hygiene products are deeply personal to us—because they are our lives.

The South Carolina “sister senators” are a powerful example of this. In a rare display of bipartisan unity, these women joined forces in 2023 to block a near-total abortion ban, arguing it would directly harm women's rights and autonomy. They listened to women, stood up for women, and prioritized sisterhood over party lines. However, this courageous stand came at a cost—each of the three Republican senators lost their primaries the following year. This highlights the unfortunate reality that when women advocate for critical issues, they often face political backlash, especially when there aren't enough allies—particularly other women—willing or able to stand with them and help fend off that resistance.

Beyond representation, women offer a fresh perspective to policy debates and negotiations. We bring different values, innovative solutions, and approaches that create more balanced, effective outcomes. Research repeatedly shows that diverse leadership yields better results. When only one type of person holds power, we all lose out on the richness of ideas that diverse voices bring to the table.

The pay issue for state and local offices add another hurdle for women considering a run for office. With low salaries and few benefits, serving in an elected position often requires individuals to be retired, financially well-off, or willing to make significant personal sacrifices. This reality disproportionately affects women. Running for office is financially unrealistic for many women, particularly those balancing household duties, childcare, or relying on dual incomes. 

Petis being sworn into Steamboat Springs City Council, 2016.

And then there’s the reminder that some still openly reject our right to participate in democracy. Just recently, statements from North Carolina’s lieutenant governor and GOP gubernatorial candidate resurfaced in which he boldly stated to a room full of women that he wishes to return to a time where women couldn’t vote. It’s 2024, and we still face this level of blatant sexism, aimed not just at our presence in office but our very right to choose our leaders.

The truth is, we’re not asking for permission to sit at the table anymore. It’s time for South Carolinian women to stop waiting for the invitation and demand a seat. In fact, screw that, let’s build our own damn tables. Our voices matter. Our experiences matter. And the future of our state depends on the strength, wisdom, and leadership that only women can bring.

This year, our focus must be on supporting the incredible women already running for office in South Carolina—through donations, volunteering, and advocating for their campaigns. But it doesn’t stop here. Next election cycle, we need to ensure even more women are stepping up to run. It’s not just about encouraging them; it’s about actively reaching out to specific women, giving them the confidence and nudge they need to see themselves in public office. 

As the great RBG said, "Women belong in every room where decisions are made"—it is time to not just be in it, but fill it and own it.

Lisel Petis is a fierce advocate for criminal justice reform and women's leadership, splitting her time between driving data-driven policy changes that make a fairer and safer justice system and creating spaces where women can lead with confidence. As the former executive director of a nonprofit dedicated to survivors of domestic and sexual violence, she played a pivotal role in establishing a Child Advocacy Center to protect vulnerable children. Lisel also served five years on the Steamboat Springs, CO City Council, championing initiatives around affordable housing, diversity, equity, inclusion, and environmental causes. She co-founded the Thrive Together Women’s Leadership Summit, a sold-out event for six consecutive years, where she has presented to women on the Art of Persuasion. Lisel also helped lead the Women's March on Steamboat for several years, amplifying the voices of women in her community. In her current role at a DC-based think tank, Lisel crafts impactful policy, writes persuasive op-eds, and collaborates with policymakers to advance critical legislation. Her expertise has been sought out on TV, radio, podcasts, and at national and international convenings, where she shares insights on community safety, justice reform, and women’s leadership. Lisel lives in Greenville, SC, with her husband and daughter.